Be a menace to Cuba cuz the only thing they'll charge you for in Texas is your juice

  • 4/11/2011
  • P-ublic E-nemy
  • Labels: ,
  • Texas executions: Strictly reserved for the radical chic

    In a controlled environment, randomly selected jurors were presented with evidence most would consider "damning":

    Source: Associated Press (March 15, 2011)
    A New York Times reporter who interviewed a shadowy ex-CIA operative about masterminding bombings that rocked hotels, nightclubs and an iconic eatery in Cuba in 1997 is set to testify at his perjury trial Wednesday after long resisting taking the stand.

    Transcripts of the interview included in court files have Posada saying, "in the hotels, we put small explosives because we don't want to hurt anybody. Just make a big scandal."

    Italian tourist Fabio di Celmo was killed by an explosion in the lobby bar of Havana's Hotel Copacabana, and about a dozen others were injured in the wave of blasts between April and September 1997. A Cuban medical examiner testified earlier in the trial that di Celmo's throat was cut when the explosion blew apart an ashtray, sending shrapnel flying. Asked about di Celmo's death, Posada said, "It's sad because it's not intentional."

    Bardach said she recorded only five or six hours of the 13 she spent talking with Posada. "He was damning on tape, but he was much more damning when it was turned off," she said.

    Posada has since recanted statements he made to Bardach, saying they were in English, which he doesn't really speak. However, Posada lived and worked in Ohio, and also served as a translator while helping the U.S. support Contra rebels.

    The New York Times gave The Associated Press additional excerpts. Those include a part where Posada says he understands English and declares he has a clear conscience, saying "I sleep like a baby."

    Not surprisingly, the all-Texan jury confirmed what researchers have long suspected - offspring of the inbred possess significantly damaged frontal lobes (part of the brain responsible for language, planning, & judgment):

    Source: McClatchy (April 8, 2011)
    EL PASO, Texas -- After deliberating for three hours, a jury of seven women and five men acquitted Luis Posada Carriles on Friday on all 11 charges of lying to immigration officials about how he entered the U.S. in 2005 and his alleged role in bombings in Cuba in 1997.

    The verdict was a surprise to many observers who had expected jurors to deliberate for several days and find Posada guilty on at least some counts. No one had predicted an acquittal across the board on all perjury, fraud and obstruction charges.

    "I feel happy," said Posada, beaming. "I am supremely grateful to the United States of America, to the fairness with which I've been judged, to the jury that absolved me and what happened here should serve as an example for justice in my country, Cuba, which is unfortunately in the hands of a dictator."

    Before this trial, researchers only possessed anecdotal evidence:

    Source: The Daily Mail
    George Osborne then recounted a meeting between Boris Johnson and George W. Bush a few years previously.

    Bush appeared to be enjoying himself until he spied Boris's wrist.

    'Are you wearing a Che Guevara watch?' asked Bush with a confused look on his face.

    'It's actually my sister's,' blushed Boris.

    'I don't care about that,' smiled Bush. 'In Texas we execute people for wearing Che Guevara watches...'


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